3/1/09

Perfect Sh@t

Editor's Note: Another long time reader submitted this personal dating/rant ad. Her retort to said poster: "wow, the perfect bronzed god-like man is walking among us mere mortals! Why are you on Craigslist if you are so incredibly hot? Seems like an appearance like that would have women falling all over themselves to get to you." Please note this ad did not include a photo. Enjoy.
Douche.gif Pictures, Images and Photos
Quite possibly the perfect man! - 36 (Portland)
Lets get past the physical stuff... I know Im hot because of how stupid girls act around me. I am constantly being hit on. I have a close to perfect hot body due to a past of athletics and a job that is very physical and keeps me in great shape, which by the way, pays very well and allows me to live a nice life. Im extremely talented in the bedroom, have a nice package... hee hee, and so talented that sometimes its overwhelming, so its a good thing if you are very experienced too.

Let's get past all of that... I want to talk about intelligence, because every girl I meet from craigslist doesn't make sense.

Some girls reply saying they are single, but then after taking much time to get to know them they are already in a serious relationship. Do they really think that wouldn't come up? Do they really think that a good relationship can be made out of that kind of screwed up start? Do they really think I care to hear about how bad their man treats them?

If you are unhappy, get the heck out of that relationship!! You have to move on if you're going to be happy.

Then there are the girls who are total slobs... Im not trying to be mean, but would a really hot hard body guy really go for someone completely out of shape? Let me just be blunt with this one.. I previously mentioned how I am about sex... I need a strong physical connection... if you are out of shape, it is highly likely you wont be able to keep up.

Do you really think that altering your photo to make you look skinny then showing up to a date being huge is going to work out? Really? Im just looking for someone at least close to really good shape.

I saved the best for last... stuck up girls. YUCK! Here is where intelligence comes to play. Do girls really think that they are going to find a perfect hot guy with lots of money who is also really dumb and would just let a girl in their life to spend away?

A guy with a good job that makes good money is very likely extremely intelligent. He is going to see right thru girls who are shallow... and Im just that type of guy who will send you average picture of me, knowing that I am way better looking in person, because that not only is a better way to start but it is also a test of how shallow you are... and man oh man, so many of you girls fail big on this one.

Do you really think you can get to know a person by email, craiglist, or a myspace profile? If you can't even take the time to meet someone, how the heck do you expect to find a great relationship? You can't classify people into little catagories to find someone. It just doesn't work that way. You have to get to know a person and love them for their individuality.

Editor's Note: It's a race to the bottom as two douche-bags battle for douche supremacy.

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