Seeking a 7.4 on the Rectum Scale

At first glance, we thought this poster might be pulling our finger (pun), however this individual is loaded and ready to unleash his gas and love with a special lady. The poster is looking to average around 40 gas releases a day.

We image the following poster's pickup line would go something like this: "Hey, did you fart? Because you blew me away!"

I love to fart. I would like to correspond with a sexy, single and attractive woman, black or white, between 23 and 42 years old with a big butt who farts a lot-farts more than the average person,(at least 35 times a day or more) farts long, loud and smelly. I want a woman who considers herself a farter in every sense of the word, so we can get our groove on together.

Please keep in mind that the farting part is absolutely the most essential quality I'm looking for in a mate...for a wild, sexual relationship. I'm a 29 year old single black male. I'm 6,0, muscular, dark brown in complexion. I live in Philadelphia, but would be more than willing to do everything necessary to meet a woman who sees herself honestly reflected in this description. A very big butt is a plus.

If you don't fit this description, please do not email me. Also, if you're not serious and are simply looking for someone to tease and do not intend to respond if I try to get in touch with you, please don't e-mail me, because I'm 100% serious.

This isn't a joke at all. I'm tired of getting e-mails from folks who pretend to fit the description, yet don't respond when I try to contact them. I've been searching for this unique woman for a long time and although the outcome of my search has so far felt quite discouraging, I have confidence that there is a woman out there who fits this description in its entirety and that she and I will cross paths through this site. I'm just a man with a unique preference looking to date a unique woman and I have nothing to be ashamed of.

I will never give up.

God speed you on your quest, Fart Man!

Also, be sure to enjoy this video of "Smart Beep's Fart in the Dark". We believe the poster would be super happy to find a girl like this one:

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