10/20/07

"The Nazi of Personal Ads"


Are you tired of boring boys? - 24
I’m really tired of having conversations that go nowhere… I hate talking about reality shows because, honestly, I don’t have enough time to watch them (though I did love the 2nd season of American Idol and my ex forced me to see a live Ruben concert… I swear, I had no say!).

I’m looking for someone who likes to have fun and who’s not a lazy mofo like most of the other people around me. What is fun to me? Well, that’s a good question now, isn’t it! I love late night coffee fueled conversations. Hell, late night alcohol fueled conversations are even better… I’m into indie film and music and haven’t been going to enough shows lately… Not much of a dancer but I'm not too cool to make an ass out of myself... Yeah… Hmmm. What else? I don’t know. I’m not looking for anything profound. Can you maintain an hour long conversation about socks? Well, I can! If that doesn’t terrify you then “holla back.” Though I promise to never use the word “holla” in the real world…

So, I made this decision easy for all by using a bulleted list. See how efficient I am? I’m like the Nazi of personal ads… Wait, I shouldn’t align myself with Nazis….

Why You Should Contact Me:

  • I’m pretty funny… Some would say witty…Others would say purple.. But purple tastes so yummy!
  • I’m a nice guy… Yeah, nice means ‘the castrated and/or gay best friend”… But I’m not castrated or gay… But I am nice…
  • I’m a writer who actually writes and works and tries to direct…
  • If you’re one of those people who care about things like ambition and stuff, well, I’m ambitious and just don’t sit on my ass waiting for things to happen
  • You can probably kick my ass if I turn out to be a creep. Yeah, yeah… I need to hit the gym more often but you can take me, isn’t that a good thing?

Why You Shouldn’t Contact Me:

  • You’re a superficial ding-bat and care that I’m fat! Though fat people socialize in a weird way, developing a lazy “Fat personality." I don’t have that. I’m not lazy and I won’t hog the seat in a bus by spreading out like some fat people do.. I HATE THAT. Fat people of the world: don’t spread out! P.S. I'm not huge, just fat...
  • You’re racist and care that I’m Indian. Yeah, boo to you and your white cloak wearing forefathers!

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